Vacation Day 1: Zion National Park (and the road there)

We started our trip at about 5 in the morning. We packed up the last of our stuff (like the cooler) and hit the road. We made a brief stop at our storage unit in Bountiful and dropped off a few things and then we kept on driving. The first part of our vacation was a stop at the Territorial State House in Filmore Utah.
This building was the Capital of Deseret for about 2 legislative sessions. They met in this room. Now it is used for Community Dances and Youth Conferences.
The building was originally going to have 4 wings and a huge dome. But only one wing was ever completed. There are pavers in the grass that show what the size of the building could have been.
Now the building is a museum and a State Park. It was the first state park we stopped at and so it was where we bought our Annual Pass for all the state parks. $75 gets us into every Utah State park until the end of May next year.

Brandon originally read this sign as Death of a Chef and we had a good laugh over that.
Lindsey this pic is for you. This is called the "Little Rock School House."
After the State House we drove down I-15 and stopped at Cove Fort.
This was built by Gordon B Hinckley's grandfather and now it is a church museum. It has lots of really neat historical furniture and quilts. These trees are over 100 years old.
Here is a picture of how packed our Jeep was all week. We rearranged it a little bit different later, but we never were able to see out the back.
And this is a picture of trail mix. Every year we make trail mix and every year it gets better and better. I couldn't resist taking a pic.
Finally we started to see something that looked like it could be Zion's Canyon. I got super excited and started taking pictures. Turns out those mountains aren't even part of the park.
But then we did get to Zion National Park and it was amazing. I spent the next several hours just looking up.
You can't believe how tall the canyon walls are. They just go up and up and up.
I had never been to Zion's so I was blown away by the greenery.
And the water.
We hiked the River Walk Trail which is a mile long paved trail that runs along the Virgin River (Brandon's joke: It's the Virgin River - even the trout wait) The trail ends at the water in what is called the Narrows, but because of high water we couldn't hike up the Narrows.
Instead we enjoyed a nice walk back up the trail. Did I mention that the park costs $25 as an entrance fee? We paid $80 for an Annual Pass to all Federal Lands. It's good until the end of next May also.
I was overwhelmed by how pretty this canyon was.
Brandon and I were so excited to be on vacation and to get away from our crazy lives for awhile.
We have been planning this trip since the beginning of December. We bought these water backpacks for ourselves for Christmas in anticipation for this trip. ($20 each - what a deal!) I'm so glad we bought them because they are way better than water bottles.
I loved this trail and I'm glad we did it first.
We even saw deer.
Here is another water fall. Don't be fooled this thing is huge!
For some reason the bathrooms were unavailable at the Riverwalk so I got to use an appropriately named "Yucca" port-a-potty.
We got our first look at Angels Landing. It is the high mountain in the front of this picture. The White Mountain behind it is the Great White Throne. The ridge in front of the Great White Throne is part of the Angels Landing hike. Less than 24 hours later we would be hiking on that ridge.
Most of the park is accessible via these really cool shuttle buses. Cars aren't even allowed in most of the Canyon during the summer months. I liked the shuttles because they allowed both me and Brandon to look out the windows and gape. Plus they played an informative guide tape on the way up the canyon so you could know what you were gaping at.
Here is another view of Angel's Landing. It is the huge cliff in the middle of the picture.
We stopped at weeping rock. Apparently the water that runs out of this rock has been seeping through it for hundreds of years. (I don't know how they test that - but whatever)
Another happy pic of us together. Did I mention we were excited to be on vacation.
Brandon getting wept on by the weeping rock.
Brandon looking like Indiana Jones.
This is on the trail to the Lower Emerald Pool.
We called this formation the "Colonoscipy"
A waterfall at the Emeral Pools. We took comfort in the fact that more people have died on this trail than have died on the Angels Landing trail.
The water was more Topaz than Emreld, but it was still pretty.
This is me under the overhang where the waterfall was coming from.
The Three Patriarchs Abriham, Issac, and Jacob (I forgot which one is which)
This is the Watchman. This mountain was right behind our campsite.
Speaking of our campsite here it is.
We stayed at The Watchman Campground for $16. It was very nice and shady. The bathrooms had running water, but no hot water. The bathrooms also didn't have electric outlets which almost caused a disaster. We planned on charging our air mattress pump with our car charger adapter thingy. But it wasn't working. As a plan B we figured we could plug it in in the bathroom, but there were no outlets. So what did we do? Brandon figured out the adapter had blown a fuse so he fixed it with Aluminum Foil from our tin foil dinners. It worked great after that, and we slept on a nice air mattress.
We ate dinner and crawled into our sleeping bags. It had been a wonderful, beautiful, relaxing day. And we still had 8 more days left on our trip.

The Babies Miscarried on Wednesday

The babies unexpectedly miscarried on Wednesday. It was a sad day, and I experienced somethings that I don't want to remember. However, emotionally I am doing fine now.

Surprisingly, I'm really happy this happened while I was on vacation. It was easy to move past the sadness while there were really cool things to distract me. I don't know how I would have handled it if I had had to go to work the next day. I'm glad that the miscarriage happened when it did when I was near running water and good bathrooms. I can't imagine it happening on some trail. I'm also glad it happened at only 11 weeks. This would be a lot harder if we had started buying stuff and picking out names.

There are two sad things about the miscarriage. 1. I now have to tell everyone that the babies aren't coming. Hearing the sadness in every one's voices is difficult. 2. I know I will have more babies, but I probably wont have twins again. I was really excited about the twins.

There are three things I learned from this:

1. I will never get an ultrasound at 10 weeks again. The probability of miscarriage is still pretty high at 10 weeks. Seeing the babies on the monitor made them seem more permanent than they were at that age.

2. I will never tell people that I am pregnant before 12 weeks again. This goes along with number 1. Also, I don't want to disappoint everyone again.

3. I can get pregnant. This is actually a happy thing. For the past 3 years I have wondered if there was something horribly wrong with me that would make it so I could never have children. Now I know that I can get pregnant. The next step is staying pregnant.

I've decided that loosing the babies feels like waking up after a really good dream. I could lay in bed and try to recapture the feelings and images from the dream, or I could get out of bed and create my own good day.

So don't worry about me or Brandon. We are okay and full of hope for the future.

Ultrasound Pictures

Brandon and I went to the doctor today for my first ultrasound. The doctor wanted to get a good idea of how far along the baby was. We found out that I am only 10 weeks along. We also found out that there are two babies inside of me!




Yeah, that's right. We are having TWINS!!!

Brandon gave me a high five and I started to cry. I am so excited about this! I'm also overwhelmed. It was amazing to see two little babies floating around kicking their little arms and legs.

Of course, we now have lots of decisions to make and I'm sure reality will set in soon enough. But for now we are are a state of excited shock!

I'm Pregnant!!!

Yeah, you read that right. After almost 2 1/2 years of trying I am finally pregnant! Here are the details.

I'm due November 29th (the day before Brandon's birthday).

I'm 11 weeks along

I had my nurses consultation on Monday

I'll have my first Dr's appt and ultrasound on Thursday

I think it is a girl

I'll find out the gender when the baby is born

Brandon is thrilled

I've thrown up 5 times

I've known I was pregnant since April 23

I waited until 60 days after my last period before I took a pregnancy test.

Okay now for the longer version. This is actually a talk I gave on Sunday for Mother's day. Several people have asked me to post it here.

I told a little about how we met and then announced I was pregnant. Here is my talk from that point forward.

"I am very grateful for my own mother and mothers in general, but in writing this talk I had a hard time deciding what to say. I finally figured out the problem -- I've spoken on Mother's day a lot. The ward I grew up in didn't have a lot of kids my age so I basically had my turn as a youth speaker every 4 to 6 months. And it seemed like every year I either spoke on Mother's or Fathers day. So that is at least 3 times that I spoke on Mother's Day. I know I spoke at least once during college on mothers day and I think I did it a second time too. So this is easily the 6th time I'm speaking on Mothers day. And now here I am trying to come up with something new to say on the subject.

I could tell you all about the great traits of my mother, and grandmothers, and mothers in general, but I feel like I've already said everything I could say on those things. Instead today I've decided to tell a story that I have never been able to share before - the story of my own journey to motherhood.

Before I begin I want to make it clear that I am not trying to influence any of you in your decisions of when to have kids. Nor am I trying to have a pity part up here. I'm sharing these things because I'm sure there are some of you out there who have hard decisions to make, or who know the pain of disappointment.

As I said Brandon and I were married 3 years ago in May. By July I was feeling like we shouldn't prevent children from entering our family. I don't know why I felt this way, but I decided to act on this promoting and discontinue birth control. This was a very scary decision to make. Both of us would be in school in the fall, neither of us had good jobs, and we didn't even have a reliable car. I took comfort in a scripture I found in 1st Nephi Chapter 17. This is the story of Nephi's family between the time Nephi broke his bow and 8 years later when they build the ship. Verses 1 through 3 read:

. . . And we did travel and wade through much affliction in the wilderness; and out women did bear children in the wilderness.

And so great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings.

And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them . . . "

I wrote this scripture down and put it on our bathroom mirror. It stayed there for a year. During that year I graduated from college, got a wonderful job, and we were able to buy a reliable car. It seemed as if the Lord had blessed us for trying to keep his commandments. I figured a baby was going to come soon. My sister who was married two weeks after me even got pregnant. So I figured my turn was right around the corner. It wasn't.

Once again I turned to the scriptures. If found the theme for our second year of marriage in D&C 123:17. This is a scripture given to Joseph Smith in Liberty Jail. Considering the misery of that place it has a very interesting message.

" . . . let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and his arm to be revealed."

I decided to be cheerful. And I'm glad I did because that year EVERYONE I knew got pregnant. My other sister who was married a year and a half after me announced she was pregnant, just about all my married friends got pregnant, even the stupid girl from the Twilight books got pregnant. But not me. However, I did the things the were in my power to do. I went to the doctor, but they didn't find anything wrong with me. That was when I knew it was Heavenly father's will and I should just stand still and wait for his arm to be revealed.

Of course standing still doesn't mean doing nothing. Instead I got really busy. I was promoted at work, Brandon and I planned parties and helped out at weddings. We went on amazing road trips. We talked about starting a wedding business. I hung out with my siblings and played with their kids. In short I filled up my time with service and I forgot about my problems . . . for the most part. I'd be lying if I said I never felt jealous when someone announced they were pregnant, or rolled my eyes when someone complained about kids. But these feelings were fleeting - I didn't have time for them.

Sometimes I would feel like I was trying too hard to compensate for not having kids, but then I found the quote for our third year of marriage. Ironically part of this quote was read at Brandon's graduation. It is by an architect named Daniel Burnham, but it was quoted by Spencer W Kimball in the July 1977 Ensign. It reads:

Make no little plans; they have no magic [there] to stir men’s blood

And probably themselves will not be realized.

Make big plans; aim high and hope and work,

Remembering that a noble, logical diagram once recorded will never die,

But long after we are gone,

Will be a living thing,

Asserting itself with ever-growing insistency.

Remember that our sons and grandsons are going to do things

That would stagger us.

Let your watchword be order and your beacon beauty. "

This has been on the mirror for the past year. It has given me courage to make big plans. A recent example is the emergency preparedness fair that Brandon and I planned. That would never have happened it I had decided to wallow in self pity over not being able to have a baby.

So now here I am at the beginning of my fourth year of marriage. And now I am scared because I am pregnant. I had my life figured out and now it is up in the air. And I am looking for a new quote for my mirror. It needs to be a good one too because there is a lot of uncertainty in my life. Brandon has graduated, we will be moving this summer, I will have to leave my job, and I need to figure out how to be a mom. I've been thinking it would be a good idea to put all three of these quotes back on my mirror. I need to remember them all. I need to remember that the Lord with bless me for keeping his commandments, that I should be cheerful, and to make big plans.

I want let all of you know that the Lord does know what is best for us. I've seen it time and time again. And where ever you are on the Motherhood scale -whether you are just starting to think about becoming a mother, or you are one - I hope you know that the Lord loves you. "

Graduation Celebrations

Brandon graduated on Saturday. We celebrated by partying hard all weekend.

My family came up Friday night. We had a pizza/ice cream party to celebrate Brandon's graduation on May 8th, Lindsey's graduation on April 30th and David's graduation this summer.

I was able to be with all my sisters for the first time since Christmas, but we were sad because my brother Billy, I mean Elder Loveless, could not be with us. He left for his summer mission to Nauvoo that morning.
Here is a picture of Rocklond enjoying veggie pizza with his Grandpa.

And here are Hillary, Emily and David enjoying ice cream. (As a side note I need to remember to be specific when I tell my family to bring their favorite ice cream topping. Both Emily and Lindsey showed up with ice cream cones and the exact same brand of sprinkles. I guess great minds think alike)
Asher and Rocklond
This is a momentous occasion. Not only is Brandon playing a card game -he is teaching it!!! He really did learn something in college.
At the graduation. (I didn't plan this but my supervisor is the in background in the right of this picture. He is wearing my cap and gown that I gave him)
Brandon with his Dad and Bestefar (Grandpa)

Everyone (well most everyone) who came for the graduation. Thanks for coming everyone. We really appreciated you making the time to come.
After the luncheon we went to the park and goofed off.
And took more pictures of Asher and Rocklond
This is how many people it takes to get a cute picture of a 6 month old and a 15 month old.

Emergency Prepardness Fair

So we had our "baby" on Saturday. We have been working on this fair for about 3 months. It turned out wonderfully. Here are some highlights.

This poster is an abbreviation of our slogan for this calling. The full quote from Spencer W Kimball is, "Preparedness, when properly pursued, is not a sudden spectacular program. It is a way of life." This is really what we strove to show during the fair. That preparedness isn't something you do once. It is something you do everyday.


We outlined the letters on Tuesday. This was super easy for us. (I'm the great granddaughter of a printer and Brandon is the son of a printer.) We used a spacing method for the alphabet that I made up over 6 years ago for Cross stitching. With a little tweaking it worked really well.

Then on Friday night we colored in the letters with these really cool paint markers that we found.
I promise I helped with this too.
Saturday morning we loaded up the jeep with displays, equipment, prizes, and tons of other stuff. I doubt we will pack this much for our 9 day camping trip in 2 weeks.
We even packed my plants.
We spent about 2 1/2 hours setting up and getting everyone situated. Then at 11:00 tons of people started showing up.
Some of the things that helped draw the crowd were the great prizes that we gave out.
The grand prize was a baking starter kit.
We bought some of the prizes with Stake money, but most of the prizes were donated by Lee's Marketplace and The Trailhead.
The only downside was that the microphone wasn't working. So every fifteen minutes Brandon had to yell out the names of the winners.
Lots of people came to the fair. The were able to talk with professional groups and people their own age about emergency preparedness. Here are some of the 20 plus booths.

This display was about making your own bread.I did a display on window box gardening.
Here is a display about freezer jam. (I hung out at this one for a while and sampled all the flavors)
Logan City Fire department came and brought some cool stuff. They even gave out carbon monoxide detectors to those with low incomes (which is just about everyone in a student stake)
Brandon did a booth on camping equipment as survival equipment. He puts it this way, "if the electricity goes out- your evening at home just turned into a camping trip."
We even set up our tent.
We also had a display from the Logan Cannery.
And Questar Gas came with scratch and sniff stickers so you could smell what natural gas smells like.
I was so excited by the number of people that attended. I was surprised at how long the people stayed. There were people who were there at 11:00 that I saw an hour later, still enjoying themselves.
I'm proud that we filled the gym.
And I am proud of how hard Brandon worked. He coordinated most of this event. I helped with the big picture, but it was Brandon that called the volunteers, asked for the donations, scheduled the building, delegated, and oversaw so much. He learned a lot about himself in the process.
Thanks to everyone who volunteered their time to help setup and take down, and who put together displays. And thanks to everyone who came.