Love Story: Part 7 - March

At the beginning of February 2007 Brandon and I knew we should get married.  We were basically engaged, but in my mind it wouldn't be official until Brandon proposed.  

For the next three weeks Brandon drove me crazy.  I was constantly expecting a marriage proposal.  We'd go on walks and I'd be thinking, "this is a really pretty place . . . maybe he'll propose here . . .guess not . . . oh were walking by the Burger King where we hung out for the second time . . . maybe he'll propose there . . . guess not . . . oh we are walking toward the temple maybe he'll propose there . . . guess not . . . I guess this is just a walk."

By the beginning of March I was getting pretty sick of waiting.  We had plans to attend family events the first weekend of March.  I didn't want show up at those parties without an official proposal story to tell.  I told Brandon that if he hadn't proposed by that Saturday I would propose to him.  He assured me we would be engaged by then.  He said it was all a matter of timing. 

But we still weren't engaged by Friday March 2.  We had plans to leave for Salt Lake after our classes ended.  Brandon came over to pick me up at my apartment.  He helped me out to his car with some of my bags.  I don't remember the exact excuse he used, but he went back into my apartment to get something or to use the bathroom.  I just got into his car and waited for him.  He didn't come. 

Just when I was about to wonder where he was he called me on my cell phone.  "Come back inside." he told me.  I didn't want to go back in, I wanted to get going to Salt Lake.  I expected that he had something planned for down there. But I went back inside anyway.  As soon as I walked into my living room He greeted me wearing his blue dress shirt.  He smiled and said, "Its the six month anniversary of when we met. I have a question to ask you.  Will you go get into your pretty pink dress and go with me to dinner?"

Of course I said yes and hurried to change.  The dress was one of my sister's prom dresses.  I'd borrowed it and brought it up to Logan back in the fall when I had been hoping Brandon would ask me on a date to USU's home dance.  He'd never asked me to the dance (he'd never even considered it), but after we got serious I'd shown him the dress and told him how I wished that he would take me somewhere I could wear it.  That wish was coming true tonight.

Brandon took me to a restaurant on Logan's main street called the Bluebird.  He'd made reservations for us to sit up in the balcony area.  We sat at a little table for two.  We could see out over the front half of the restaurant.  Everyone who walked in could see us.  One of the girls from our ward came into the restaurant and saw us.  She waved and smiled.  She had her suspicions about what this night meant.
 
I was so happy to be all dolled up and on a date in a restaurant with Brandon.  We were both poor college students so we hardly ever went out like this.  I suspected that Brandon would propose to me at the restaurant.  But after three weeks of false alarms I wasn't getting my hopes up.

Brandon was acting very strange during dinner.  He kept checking his phone and sending quick text messages.  I could tell that he was having a hard time making conversation.  He was so nervous.  I kept expecting him to drop to one knee and pop the question any second.

We finished dinner without any proposals though.  Brandon suggested we order dessert.  That was something else we never did.  I wondered if a ring would be delivered with dessert.  It wasn't.

When we finished dessert I decided that my chances of getting proposed to that night were over.  We got into the car and started driving toward Salt Lake.  I began going over a mental packing list to make sure I hadn't forgot anything.  "Did you remember your laptop computer?" I asked Brandon.  I didn't know it, but I had played right into his hands.

"Oh no! I left it by the door in my apartment." He said.  He couldn't believe his luck. He had been just about to "remember" that he "forgot" his computer.

He drove back to his apartment.  When we got there I told him that I would wait in the car while he went in.  I'd had a lot of dessert and I didn't feel like getting out of the car.  "Come in with me." he asked.  "Please."
So I got out of the car and walked with him to his apartment.  I was completely oblivious to the soft glow of light coming from his window.  He opened his door and the whole room was full of candlelight.  He'd rearranged his furniture so the living room was an open space.  He had the remote to his CD player in his pocket and he pulled it out and pushed play.  Our song, God Blessed the Broken Road, started playing.  "Will you dance with me."  Brandon asked.

I knew this was the moment.  I was so impressed by how much effort Brandon put into creating the prefect setting.  There were rose petals all over the floor.  He even had roses for me.  He'd asked his friend Trina and her fiance to come over and light the candles for him.  That's who he had been texting during dinner.    

It was the exact 6 month anniversary of when we first met.  We were dancing - just like we had when I first realized that Brandon was the man I wanted to marry.  This was the same place as our first kiss.  The same room we'd first said I love you.  This would be our home when we got married.  And here we were about to get engaged.  

The first song ended and "I can't help falling in love" started playing.  Brandon said, "This song has been running through my mind a lot the past few weeks."  And then he got down on one knee.  He pulled a ring box out from under his stereo system (he'd worried that he would jump the gun and propose to me at the restaurant if he'd brought the ring with him.)  I wish I could remember the exact words he told me, but I was too excited to focus.  I do remember that his voice caught as he told me how much he loved me.  That he wanted to spend the rest of his life and eternity with me.  And he asked me to marry him. 

I'd known what my answer would be since the second week of September.  He'd known what the answer would be since November.  Our wedding date was already reserved with the Bountiful Temple.  So it really wasn't surprising when I answered "yes."  But oh it felt so good to finally say it.

I hadn't expected a ring.  As a flight student Brandon didn't have a lot of extra money.  He'd been concerned about being able to get married if he couldn't even afford a ring.  I told him that I didn't want a ring - I wanted him!  The ring was simple with a small diamond.  I know some girls would turn their nose up at the ring that Brandon was able to afford.  But I proudly put it on my finger because it meant that the very best man in the whole world wanted to me for his wife.  

It was official!  We were finally engaged.  We blew out the candles and left Brandon's apartment.  I don't remember anything about the hour and a half drive from Logan to Salt Lake.  I'm sure Brandon and I spent the whole time talking about wedding plans. 

Once we got to Salt Lake we went to my parents house.  During our last visit to Salt Lake Brandon had been able to ask my dad for permission to marry me.  So my parents weren't very surprised when we showed up all dressed up and announced we were engaged.  

They were however, surprised at the date of our wedding.   I knew that no matter what day I picked for my wedding my mom would try to convince me to move it up.  She had been telling me for months how much she hated her three month long engagement.  She kept telling me that she wished it had only been 2 months.  I knew that if I told her we were planning on getting married in May she would try to talk me into April - which wouldn't work at all because Brandon and I would still be in school.  So I'd been hinting that we were talking about a June wedding.  When Brandon and I announced our wedding date as May 17, my mom beamed. 

After telling my parents, we got in the car and drove 10 minutes to Brandon's house.  His sister Shannon's daughter was being blessed on Sunday and so his sister Melanie and her family were in town.  His parents and siblings were all in the downstairs family room when we announced our engagement.  They cheered and congratulated us.  We told them the date of the wedding.  One reason we had already reserved the temple was to avoid feeling like we needed to accommodate everyone's schedules when we picked a wedding date.  We'd already made sure the 17th worked for our parents, but aside from them we didn't want to have work around everyone else's plans.  It's a good thing we did that because as soon as we announced our date one of Brandon's sister's said that they already had another wedding that weekend.  We told her we loved her and understood if she couldn't make it.  There were no hard feelings at all.  (And she ended up coming to our wedding anyway.)

The next day we went to my cousin's baptism.  I was able to announce my engagement to most of my extended family.  On Sunday we went to Brandon's niece's blessing and were able announce our engagement there.

On Monday we were back in Logan and were able to tell our friends at school and work.  The only announcement I still remember was when we went to our Family Home Evening Activity.  It was at one of the bishopric members' house.  As soon as we walked in the door my friend Kristin noticed my ring.  She didn't say anything to me, but I saw her whisper something in her boyfriend Dave's ear.

Kristin and Dave were in the process of getting engaged/planning a wedding too.  They also reserved the their temple before getting engaged.  In fact, Kristin even had her dress.  They would get married two weeks after us on June 1, and would live in the same married student ward as us for several years.
    
A few weeks before I got engaged I was asked to serve on the ward's compassionate service committee.  I knew I would be very distracted by my wedding but I agreed to serve anyway.  A few weeks after I was engaged I confessed to Kristin that I felt bad because I never did anything with my calling because I was so busy planning my wedding.  I told her that I didn't even know who the committee leader was.  She laughed and said, "that's because I'm the committee leader and I'm busy with my wedding too."  We had a good laugh over that.

Over the next two months Brandon and I would alternate spending one weekend in Logan and the other weekend in Salt Lake getting things ready for our wedding.  One one weekend in Salt Lake I had lunch with my elementary school friends Ashley and Becky.  Ashley's husband Dave, Becky's fiance Dan, and Brandon joined us.  

That same weekend my dad took Brandon and I to Murray Park for a photo shoot.  My dad loved taking pictures of his daughters so this was something he'd been looking forward too for a long time.

Brandon and I enjoyed taking the pictures too.  I'm going to show you some of my favorites.  I don't really have anything specific to say about each of them other than please notice how skinny I was.

This is one of my all time favorite pictures of us together.

As pretty as all the pictures that my dad took of us were, I had something specific in mind for our wedding announcement pictures.  I wanted to take our pictures next to one of the DA40 Diamond airplanes that Brandon was learning how to fly.  Aviation was going to be a significant part of our relationship and I wanted our wedding announcement to reflect that.  

So one Saturday Brandon's dad came up and we took him to the Logan Airport to take our pictures.

It was a really sunny day and the light really hurt my eyes.  But the pictures turned out great.

It was really hard to pick a favorite.

There were a lot to choose from.

In the end this is the one that won out.  We did everything ourselves with Brandon's copy of Adobe photoshop.  

We spent Spring Break in Salt Lake and I took my mom and my sister with me to go dress shopping.  We went to three stores.  Finally we found my dream dress at Fantasy Bridal.  We also found a veil, shoes, and jewelry.  The total cost was $508.19.  I paid for it all with my own money.  That was one of the proudest moments of my life.  Especially when there was another girl on her cell phone practically pleading with her Daddy to, "please just pay for this and I wont ask for anything else for the whole wedding, pleeeeeseeee."

All month long my sister Lindsey and I had been discussing her relationship with her boyfriend, John.  They'd known each other since November and had been dating seriously since December.  They were talking marriage as well.  The big question was when would they get engaged and what day would they pick for their wedding.

At the end of March John proposed to Lindsey. They ended up picking June 2nd for their wedding date.  So now my family was going to have 2 weddings a little over 2 weeks apart.

Love Story: Part 6 - February

Before I met Brandon I would wonder how people could meet and fall in love so fast.  But within two weeks of meeting him I knew that he was someone I could marry.  It took him a little bit longer.  Still it was only about 5 months later in January 2007 that Brandon and I were pretty sure that we wanted to get married.  

At the end of January I'd somehow convinced Brandon that we should get married sometime in May.  We both wanted to be sure that marrying each other was what Heavenly Father wanted for us.  So we decided to fast about our decision on the first Sunday in February.  The LDS church designates the first Sunday of each month as a "Fast Sunday."  This wasn't our first time fasting, but this was probably the first time I fasted for something so important.  On Saturday night Brandon and I knelt down in his living room and offered a prayer to open our fast.  We did't eat or drink anything until Sunday evening when we again knelt and said a prayer to end out fast.  Neither of us felt any sort of spiritual promoting one way or another.  

I was a little worried about the lack of an absolute "yes" answer from heaven.  Did that mean we shouldn't get married?  I pondered about it the next few days and the words of the scripture Doctrine and Covenants 6:22-23 came into my mind: 

Verily, verily, I say unto you, if you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things.

Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God?

That reminded me of the time back in the fall when I had been praying about whether or not it was a good use of my time to date Brandon.  I'd been praying about that question for a few days.  Then one morning while I was taking a shower the thought, "It's okay to pursue him" came into my mind.  I knew from the peace I felt that it was the Holy Ghost giving me an answer to my prayer.

As I remembered the peace and absolute certainty that I'd had about dating Brandon, I realized that those feelings also applied to marrying him.  I knew Heavenly Father wanted us to get married.

I didn't tell Brandon yet, because I could tell he wasn't so sure.  I was used to being ahead of him as far as the plans for our relationship went, so I didn't worry.

Despite Brandon's reservations about if we should get married, he was still a good boyfriend.  My 22nd birthday was the Wednesday after we fasted.  I invited a few friends over to my apartment and Brandon made a German Chocolate cake for everyone.  He gave me a really sweet card too.  And he gave me some nice pens.  The pens had special significance because he'd been talking about how he looked forward to addressing wedding invitation envelopes with me.  

I was excited about the meaning of the pens, but Brandon still seemed to be holding back from me.  That weekend we had a heart to heart conversation.  

Brandon admitted that he'd spent all week worried about getting engaged.  He said that he just wasn't sure if it was something we were supposed to do.  Just as I started getting worried he told me, "but then I was thinking about it while I was taking a shower.  And I thought about that scripture, the one that says something like 'did I not speak peace to your mind?'  And I realized that I always feel so much peace when I think about marrying you.  So I think we are supposed to get married."  

I started crying.  I couldn't believe that we had both thought of the same scripture.  I told Brandon how that scripture fit into my own spiritual confirmation that we should get married.  Brandon couldn't believe it either.  "Well I guess we should get engaged then." he said. 

From that moment on it became Brandon's goal to torture me with anticipation for how and when he would officially pop the question.  

Valentine's Day was coming up and I kind of suspected that he would propose then.  Unfortunately I was really busy that week.  I told Brandon, "Um I have a ton of homework and projects this week.  So please don't propose to me on Valentine's Day."  And Brandon said, "I wasn't planning on it anyway."

I don't know why I thought I would be able to focus better on school if I wasn't engaged, because I was very distracted by anticipation.  

Even though we weren't officially engaged I started planning out wedding.  I went to another bridal fair and got lots of ideas.  I came back from the fair and told Brandon, "I can't decide what kind of backdrop I want.  There was a really neat one with water in the back, but there was another one I liked that had a mirror.  What do you think?"  He said, "why not do both."  Then he sat down and drew a sketch of what would eventually be our waterfall on a mirror backdrop.

One weekend we went down to Salt Lake and I talked Brandon into checking out the cultural hall of my parents Stake Center.  I'd already dreamed up how I wanted everything to look, but I wanted Brandon's input.  I showed him the room and told him all my ideas.  Then he walked into the middle of the room and said, "I think we can do this.  I'm excited about doing this."  I fell in love with him all over again when he said that.

As we drove back to Logan on Sunday night we decided to take a quick detour up to the Bountiful Temple.  Brandon had been trying for weeks to convince me that I didn't want to get married in the Salt Lake Temple.  His argument was that everyone gets married there.  He wanted to do something different.  His choice was the Bountiful Temple.  He had me 95% convinced but I needed to see the temple to be sure.  So we went up there and walked around.  It was beautiful and I knew we should get married there. 

The brakes to Brandon's crappy Pontiac overheated as we drove down the steep hill from the temple.  So we pulled over in the parking lot for the Bountiful Rec Center.  We decided to go on a little walk while they cooled off.  We ended up at the Smith's MarketPlace about 10 blocks away.  We loved that store so we took a break on the patio furniture inside the store.  We joked, "Bountiful has a Smith's MarketPlace.  We should move here."  We had no idea that three years later we would live a mile away from that store.      

I had sort of hoped that Brandon would propose to me while we were up at the temple.  But I was starting to get used to the endless waiting.  Everything Brandon did seemed like a potential engagement opportunity.  He'd say, "do you want to go on a walk?" and I'd perk up.  About an hour into the walk I'd realize it was just a walk.    He'd make me dinner and I'd expect a proposal but it would turn out to be just dinner.  This went on for the rest of the month.

I wasn't being very helpful in my own way.  For some reason I couldn't stand to go ring shopping.  I knew that Brandon didn't make a lot of extra money putting things together for Home Depot and Smiths MarketPlace.  I knew that he had a lot of student loans.  I knew that any money he did have needed to go toward his flight account.  I just couldn't bring myself to go into a jewelry store to pick out a ring that he couldn't afford.  Brandon tried to get me to at least point out a ring that I liked, but every time we tried to go near a jewelry counter I would end up turning around.  I finally told him, "I don't want a ring.  I want you."  

We'd settled on Thursday May 17th as the day that we wanted to get married.  Even though we weren't officially engaged I had Brandon call up the Bountiful Temple and reserve a sealing room for 9:45 am. I was worried all the rooms would be reserved if we waited much longer.  

By the end of February I was getting pretty anxious about how long it was taking Brandon to propose.  He kept reassuring me that it was just a matter of timing, but I was still getting worried.  We both had big family get-togethers scheduled for the first weekend in March.  I didn't want to go to those events and have to sidestep the inevitable "so are you two planning on getting married" questions.

I told Brandon that if he didn't propose to me by March 3rd I would propose to him.

Read about how we finally got engaged here.

Love Story: Part Five - January

By January of 2007 Brandon and I had known each other for 4 months.  We'd quickly progressed from our first date in September to becoming a couple in November.  At the end of December we had started talking about marriage.  

We began having conversations that went like this, "Well if we get married we should do _____."  Or, "If we get married we should ______." or,  "We need to remember _____ IF we get married."  The more sure we were about our eventual marriage the more we exaggerated the way we would say "if."  It got the the point where we would say it, "iiiiiiiifffffffff."

We were pretty certain we were going to get married, but we discovered that we had different opinions of how long we should be engaged.  My parents had always told me that shorter engagements are better.  They had been engaged for three months and my mom told me that was too long.  My dad even did role plays with me and my sisters when we were young where he practiced with how to tell our future husbands (and mother in laws) that we wanted short engagements.  

Brandon on the other hand was expecting to have about a six month engagement.  That's how long both of his sisters' engagements had lasted and so it seemed the right length of time to him.  

I wasn't so thrilled about that. Back when I had first fallen for Brandon in September I'd imagined that we would get married after the spring school semester ended.  I figured that was still a pretty good plan.  I didn't see any reason we had to wait until August or September to get married.  

One of Brandon's main concerns was money.  He didn't think we could afford to get married any time soon.  I countered that by telling him that I was paying $245 a month for my apartment and he was paying $350.  If we got married we could save on the cost of my apartment.  

He didn't have a good response to that because it was obvious that we didn't need my apartment.  The only things I did there were sleep, shower, and get ready for the day.  I ate all my meals over at Brandon's house.  I did that because we'd started grocery shopping together.  I had a steadier income than he did and so I started buying food to keep at his house so I wouldn't feel bad when he cooked for me. 

Every morning I'd get up and get ready.  Then I'd walk over to his house and let myself in with the key he'd given me.  Brandon had class at 7:30 so he was already gone.  I'd eat cheerios for breakfast and then walk up to campus for my classes and work.  After school or work I'd come back to his house.  Some days he was home already, but other's he would still be at school.  If he wasn't home yet I'd start making dinner.  We'd eat together and then do homework.  If we had time we'd watch a movie or TV show together, and then he'd walk me home.  I made sure I was home around 11:00.  I also made sure that my roommates at least saw me so they wouldn't think I was sleeping over at Brandon's place.  

Of course we didn't just hang out at his house.  We'd go to church on Sundays and Family Home Evening activities on Mondays.  Brandon was what we referred to as a "ward celebrity," meaning, everyone knew and loved him.  He was the co-chair of the activities committee.  He loved his calling and loved planning the monthly linger longer dinner.  

Our bishop was a skiing enthusiast and he decided to plan a skiing activity at the Beaver Mountain Ski Resort up Logan Canyon.  He put Brandon in charge of a lot of the details.  Brandon had lots of fun designing the flyer for the activity.  One Saturday Brandon and I went on a drive to scout out the location of the lodge.  We had a great time on that drive.  

After we checked out the ski resort we drove to Bear Lake and looked at how pretty it looked in the winter.  

On our way down the canyon we stopped to cut some red willows that were growing on the side of the road.  The bishops wife had some displayed in two big urns in her home and I wanted to do something similar on a smaller scale.  We cut a whole bunch of branches and then piled them into the back of Brandon's Pontiac.

A few miles later we passed a man and a women walking on the side of the road.  Brandon pulled over and offered them a ride.  They said yes and so he hurried to move the branches to the trunk.  The people got in and explained that they were with the national forest and were out putting up signs directing snow-mobilers to stay off certain areas.  They'd placed all their signs and were just walking back to their truck.

Brandon and I were pretty worried that the rangers would bring up something about our sticks.  We had no idea whether or not it was legal to cut them.  The rangers didn't say anything though.  We were relived when they got out of the car.

The day of the ski activity was really fun.  Lots of people came to the activity.  My friend Amy was in another stake, but she came with us.  I think we even set her up on a date with someone.  None of us were interested in skiing so we stayed inside and ate soup, played games, and watched the movie Cars.

Brandon had gone to a lot of trouble to play that movie.  In order to comply with copyright laws, the activity had to be considered an institute activity.  (Somehow the Logan LDS Institute had permission to legally show certain movies to large groups of people.)  So Brandon,who was kind of proud of the fact that he'd never taken an institute class, had to hand out bookmarks and ask people to register for institute classes.

It was a great activity and I was immensely proud of how hard Brandon had worked to plan it.

I had my own plans going on too.  I went to the Bridal Fair at the USU Campus.  I'd attended the one in the fall as just something fun to do. This time I went to get ideas for my real wedding.  The one I would have IF Brandon and I decided to get married.

The whole IF thing was getting more and more laughable every day.  We both knew that we were going to get married.  In fact, one night we sat down together in my room at my apartment (we did hang out there once and a while) and made a count down chain to our wedding.

We didn't have an exact date in mind yet.  But I'd got Brandon to at least consider a June wedding.  So the chain had enough links on it to count down to sometime in June.

I was pretty excited by the level of commitment the chair represented.

But I was still worried by how long Brandon wanted our engagement to be.  One day I came home from work and told Brandon, "look, I need to know when you plan on getting married.  I need to know what to do about my housing contract. Should I renew it for the summer, or can I tell them I won't need it?

"Well let's see,"  Brandon said.  He took me over to the calender and flipped to a page.  I thought it would be for June so I was surprised when I saw it was for May.  "Pick a day."  Brandon said with a smile.  I was incredibly happy.

Earlier we'd talked about how we wanted to get married on a Thursday and have our reception the next day on a Friday.  I wanted to have at least a two week break between finals week and our wedding.  We decided that we would either get married on the 17th or the 24th of May.

Now all that was left to do was to actually get engaged.

Click here for what happened next.

Love Story: Part Four - December

Brandon and I were set up on a blind date at the beginning of September of 2006.  He kissed me three weeks later, but then told me he wasn't interested in a romantic relationship.  We spent all of October getting to know each other as friends.  He kissed me again at the beginning of November.  By the end of the month we were an official couple.  

Brandon knew that I wanted to marry him, but he wasn't ready for that kind of commitment yet.  And neither was I really.  I was content to enjoy life as his girlfriend for a while.  

I'd stopped writing in my journal after our "second first kiss" so I don't have a good record of what we did every day in December.  I did retroactively fill in a calender with important relationship milestones so at least I have something to jog my memory.  

That calender is pretty blank for the first week of December.  I'm sure we spent most of our time doing homework together.  The semester was winding down and there were papers and projects to complete.  

We went to Salt Lake for the weekend and I tagged along to his extended family Christmas Party.  I worried that it would be awkward to be introduced as "Brandon's Girlfriend" but everyone was really nice. 

The next week was finals week.  Every morning Brandon and I met up at his apartment and then walked up the steep hill on 700 North to get to campus.  We'd eat the free breakfast that the LDS institute provided during finals week.  Then we'd split up and go take tests or study.  I also worked a few hours at my job.  At the end of the day we'd meet back up at Brandon's apartment.  

Finals week was always a weird week for me.  On the one hand it was extremely stressful because of all the tests.  But on the other hand it was really fun because the regular class schedule was over.  Aside from worrying about our respective tests, Brandon and I had the most free time we'd had all semester.    

One night we used our new-found free time to try to make pine needle air freshener out of real pine needles.  We chopped up pine needles that we found outside and then boiled them.  Then we strained out the water from the needles using coffee filters that we bought for the project.  Brandon put the water into an old hairspray bottle that he just happened to have.  The spray really did smell like pine needles, but the scent didn't last very long.     

As far as I remember we both passed all of our classes that semester.  I remember the look on Brandon's face when he found out he'd passed his College Algebra class.  It was the only college math class that he passed on the first try.  (Though he'd always get an A on the second - or third - tries.)

At the end of the week we celebrated the end of school by decorating Brandon's apartment for Christmas.  I wanted to buy a Christmas tree, but I didn't want to set it up at my apartment.  I'd asked Brandon if I could set it up at his apartment.  He said yes and bought the lights.  After Christmas when we took the tree down we put the tree in his closet.  I told him, "remember, if we break up it's my tree."  And he said, "well they are my lights."  (And we remind each other of that every year.)

I also bought some sparkly ball shaped ornaments because I'd always wanted to decorate a tree with fancy balls.  As a final touch we cut snow flakes out of the coffee filters.  Decorating a tree together was more than just something fun to do.  In a way it was a symbol of our growing relationship.  We were starting our own holiday traditions.

The Saturday after finals week we went on a date to Ogden Utah.  My brother Billy had a high school symphony concert at Weber State University.  We planned to do things in Ogden during the day and then see the concert that night.  We both knew this was kind of an important day.  We'd spent hours and hours together every day the past week.  If we could make it through an all day date together without getting sick of each other then we'd know that we had a pretty good relationship going.

We started out the day at the Ogden Train Museum.  I've always kind of had a thing for trains.  When I was in high school I'd walk to and from school via an illegal short cut on a train bridge.  I loved the view from the train tracks.  Some days I'd hear the train whistle and so I wouldn't get on the tracks.  I'd watch the powerful train go by from the sidewalk that was about 15 feet below the tracks.  Once I was driving in the evening and I had to stop for a train at another part of the tracks.  It was dark and so the train had it's light on.  I was impressed by that bright light and the big train chugging by right in front of my car.  I couldn't believe how magnificent the train looked.  It made me feel small.    

Brandon didn't know I liked trains, but he knew it was a fun museum.  We played around on the large trains outside the old train station and then we went inside to see the model trains.  I was enchanted by the little model train that chugged it's way through the different displays.  I was like a little kid as I followed the train around.  Brandon thought my enthusiasm was cute.

After we finished up at the museum we drove to a park and ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in Brandon's car.  This was the first of many times we would save money by bringing our dinner from home instead of eating out at a restaurant.

Then we drove over to Weber State University and met up with my parents, my sister Lindsey, and her new boyfriend John.  Lindsey and John had met on the 11th of November.  They'd recently become a couple.  My parents took this picture of the four of us.     

The concert was great (Billy's concerts are always great), but even better was the fact that Brandon and I weren't sick of each other yet.  In fact as we got back in the car to drive back to Logan Brandon thought of something we could do to extend our time in Ogden.  He drove to downtown Ogden and parked the car.  Then we walked to the Christmas Village.  I never even knew about the village.  I was so impressed by all the cute little displays.  Once again I was like a little kid running around and getting excited.

Our relationship had survived a week of constant togetherness and so we continued to spend as much time together as possible.  School was over so all we had to worry about was work.  I worked 20 hours a week as an office assistant and Brandon worked putting together bikes for Smith's MarketPlace.  When we weren't working we'd relax by watching our favorite TV shows on DVD.  I was introducing Brandon to Veronica Mars and he was acquainting me with MacGyver.

On Thursday the 21st, Brandon was in charge of an activity at the church.  We planned to leave for Salt Lake as soon as the activity was over.  Brandon set up a projector and we watched Muppet Christmas Carol.  We turned out to be some of the only people there.  Most everyone else had already skipped town and gone home for the holidays.

We continued to see each other a lot when we were in Salt Lake.  Our parent's homes were only about 15 minutes away from each other so it was easy to get together.  We went Christmas shopping together some days.  Brandon invited me to his family's Christmas Eve party.  I brought my brother Billy and sister Emily along with me.  We had fun playing Christmas songs on the chimes.  Billy impressed everyone by being able to play three chimes and still keep up.

I felt awkward staying the whole time at the "family" party so I left early before the traditional dancing around the Christmas tree.

Brandon and I got together the next day and exchanged gifts.  He'd bought me slippers with rubber soles so I could wear them when he walked me home from his apartment every night.  I bought him a page a day Far Side Calender.

The days after Christmas were spent seeing different things in the Salt Lake area.  One day we went to the Clark Planetarium.  Another day we went to see the lights at Temple Square.  We went to Dee's and ate with Brandon's brother Bryan and his friend Jake.  (Apparently that was their hang out in high school.)

Towards the end of the month we went on a walk at the Jordan Parkway.  We started talking about our thoughts on marriage.  We'd talked about it before, but this time it seemed more serious.  I told Brandon that I'd like to get married in May or June.  He said that he didn't want to get married until September.  I was a little crushed that he still thought we needed to wait 9 more months before getting married.  I remember getting back into his car and wondering if he would ever want to commit to anything.

On New Years Eve we spent the evening watching movies at his parent's house.  After midnight we got into his car to take me home.  Brandon's car had "cancer of the electrical system."  Sometimes it wouldn't start and we'd have to wait 5 minutes before trying to start it again (this was always a great opportunity to makeout.)  The car didn't start and so we sat and talked.  Brandon asked me, "what should our goal be for the New Year?"  I replied with, "to get married."  And he said something like, "we'll see."

Click here to find out what happened next.

Love Story: Part Three - November

I met Brandon at the beginning of September 2006.  By the end of the month we had already had our first kiss followed by our first DTR (Defining The Relationship) talk.  In that talk he told me that he wasn't interested in a relationship, but we could still be friends.  

Brandon made good on that promise and our friendship developed throughout the month of October.  We started at least seeing each other every day.  I could tell that Brandon wanted to kiss me again, but all he did was hold my hand and cuddle with me.  At the end of the month Brandon went to Salt Lake for a visit home.  He didn't call me the whole weekend.  I was afraid that he would come back from that weekend and tell me that he didn't want to spend as much time with me anymore.

I shouldn't have worried.  We hung out again on his first day back in Logan.  Hanging out usually consisted of doing homework at his house, making dinner together, watching a movie (while cuddling), and then walking back to my apartment.  We still had some late nights, but usually I went home around midnight. 

I was pretty certain that I would see Brandon everyday so I didn't feel a need to keep postponing going home each night.  I also stopped inventing reasons to go to his apartment every day.  In the early days of our friendship I'd make sure I left something at his apartment so I'd have a reason to call him up and talk to him again. But now I felt comfortable calling him and saying, "hey, I'm bored can I come over?"

And I was legitimately bored quite often.  I had two roommates who I didn't really click with.  They were both nice, but I didn't relate to them enough to want to hang out with them.  I had some friends who I did hang out with occasionally, but they had jobs, homework, and relationships of their own.  Ultimately Brandon was the only person I wanted to spend time with on a regular basis.  He was, after all, the man I wanted to marry.      

I had been praying to know whether or not it was a good use of my time to keep spending time with Brandon.  The last thing I wanted to do was waste my time on a guy that I shouldn't be with.  One day, while taking a shower, I was thinking about Brandon.  The thought came to my mind, "it's okay to pursue him."  The word pursue was especially fitting since I was the one who usually had to take the initiative and call him up (though he would call me too).  

My plan was to spend time with Brandon and have fun.  I figured that eventually he'd either get sick of me - in which case I'd move on - or he'd realize that he wanted to marry me.  Either way he was such a great guy that I didn't feel I was wasting my time.

Our relationship took a big step forward the evening of November 3rd.  It was a Friday night and as usual I was over at Brandon's apartment.  We made chocolate chip cookies and then watched a movie or two.  After the movies ended I didn't go home.  Instead Brandon and I kept talking and cuddling on his super uncomfortable and misnamed "love seat."   

As the hours went by I was aware of two things.  1.  I'd dropped a few chocolate chips down my shirt by accident when we were making cookies.  I never had a chance to get them out without Brandon noticing.  I could feel them melting against my skin.  But 2. I could sense that Brandon really wanted to kiss me so I didn't plan on going anywhere until he made his move.  

Around 4:00 am Brandon and I were still awake and talking to each other.  We had wedged ourselves into a somewhat comfortable position laying next to each other on the love seat.  Our lips were incredibly close together, I wanted to kiss him so badly, but I wanted him to kiss me first.  I needed him to know that he had initiated the kiss.  So I just kept talking to him as if nothing out of the ordinary was going on.    

And then he kissed me!  We would later refer to it as our "second first kiss."  I don't remember much about it other than I was so happy that it had finally happened.  By kissing me Brandon was signaling that he was willing be more than just friends with me.  

Brandon and I stayed on the love seat the rest of the night. We kissed some more, but mostly we just tried to sleep on that awful couch.  I was a little worried about staying the whole night at his house, but I knew that I wouldn't let anything progress beyond kissing.  I'd made up my mind on that matter long before meeting Brandon.  And I had a mess of melted chocolate chips down my shirt.     

The kiss had changed things between us, but I wasn't Brandon's girlfriend yet.  Instead we'd moved to the "friends with benefits" status.  I had always been leery of this status with other guys.  But Brandon was different.  For one I knew that there was no way he had any other girls on the side.  He spent way too much time with me for there to be any other serious prospects out there.  In fact, the day after our second first kiss he was walking me home and said something like, "so we are planning on seeing each other every day right?"

A few days later Brandon took me for a drive up Logan Canyon.  We stopped at Third Dam and got out of the car.  We went for a walk but there was snow everywhere so we ended up just sitting on a picnic table.

"So where do you see our relationship going?"  Brandon asked me.

"Well, don't get scared, but if you asked me to marry you I would say yes."  I answered candidly.

"Well, I'm not asking you."  Brandon hurried and said.

"I'm not asking you to."  I explained, "I just thought you should know how I feel."

After that was out in the open we had a talk about what we thought our relationship should be.  We opened up and were completely honest about how we felt about each other.  Neither of us wanted to waste time in a relationship playing coy little cat and mouse games with our feelings.  Brandon was still a little commitment shy, but I understood his reasons better.  He'd been in a relationship before that had been bad for him and he wanted to make sure things were going well between us before getting in too deep.  He was also trying to focus on school and flying, and he didn't want to get too involved with someone who would interfere with those things.

By the end of the  DTR (Defining The Relationship) talk we had decided to not become boyfriend and girlfriend yet.  Instead we'd continue with the whole "friends with benefits" thing for a while and see where it went.

Where it went turned out to be a lot of "boyfriend/girlfriend" type things. During the next 10 days we did the following: My new furniture finally showed up and Brandon helped move it into my apartment.  We went to a Girls' Choice institute dance together.  Brandon gave me a ride and hung out with me at my friend's bridal shower.  We signed up for tithing settlement with appointments right next to each other.  We organised the ward Activities Committee closet supplies.  Brandon took me on a drive to see his family's property in Eden.  I met Brandon's family and went to his sister's baby shower.  He met my family and went to my sister's high school musical performance.

In Eden

Brandon was in charge of a linger longer after church on Sunday November 19th.  It was a huge Thanksgiving dinner type event that involved lots of turkey and other Thanksgiving food.  There was also a pie making contest.  Brandon and I had made a pumpkin pie together.  It won "best tasting."  I later confessed that I didn't like pumpkin pie, and Brandon wondered why I had helped him make one.

After the linger longer was all cleaned up I met up with Brandon at his apartment.  Somehow we ended up laying on the floor and talking together.  I mentioned that everyone in the ward thought we were an official couple.  Brandon said something like, "well we do spend a lot of time together." We started talking about our relationship again.  I brought up the point that since everyone thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend we might as well be boyfriend and girlfriend.  Brandon thought about it for a minute and then he agreed.

He also told me that he loved me.  He said, "I don't LOVE you, but I love you."  I told him I felt the same way.  

This picture was either taken right after Brandon agreed that we should be a couple, or after he told me he loved me.  Either way I was pretty happy.

A few days later we went down to Salt Lake together for Thanksgiving.  One of the great things about our relationship was that our parents only lived 15 minutes away from each other.  So we were able to spend a lot of time together over Thanksgiving break.  Since we were such a new couple neither of us felt comfortable inviting the other to our Thanksgiving dinner.  But I went over to his house on Wednesday night and he came over to mine for pie and games on Thursday night.  We also hung out together on Friday.  And on Saturday we went to a hockey game with his sister and brother in law and their friends.    

The Monday after Thanksgiving we went to Brandon's FHE "Family Home Evening" activity.  (I never once went to my assigned "family."  I always tagged along with Brandon.)  It was a pie eating contest and Brandon won for eating the fastest.  It was our first ward activity as an official couple, but I don't think anyone noticed anything different.

Everything was going great in our relationship.  But at the end of the month I had a tiny problem.  It was Brandon's birthday and I had no idea what to get him for a present.  I ended up giving him what I considered to be "our song."  It was "Bless the Broken Road" by Rascal Flats.  I felt like it perfectly described my search for someone as great as Brandon.

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
It was a good present, but it would be 6 years before I felt like I gave Brandon the birthday he deserved.

On Brandon's birthday we went to Burger King (it really was the only place we ever wanted to eat out) and then went for a walk up and down Main street.  We had fun looking at all the displays and window shopping.  It was a perfect evening with glittery snow falling lightly. As we passed Levan's Bridal I stopped dead.  There in the display window was my dream wedding dress.  I pointed it out to Brandon and told him, "I've never seen a dress that I liked as much as that one."

Brandon said something like, "maybe it's a sign."  I think he meant it to be teasing, but it came out sounding rather serious.  Then Brandon seemed a little embarrassed for bringing up marriage.  I knew that we still had a long way to go before he would be ready to talk about that type of commitment.

Click here to find out what happened next.

Love Story: Part Two - October

It's a new month which means its time for another installment in the story of how Brandon and I got together back in 2006.  It's kind of fun to think that when I depended on him to get me though a haunted forest I NEVER imagined that 7 years later I'd need him to deliver our fourth child.  

Here's a quick recap of what happened in September.  Brandon and I were set up on a blind date by our mutual friend Marie.  We liked each other and hung out a lot after that date.  Within two weeks I knew I wanted to marry Brandon.  We had our first kiss after knowing each other for a little over three weeks.  But Brandon didn't want to commit to any sort of a relationship besides friendship.  I decided to just cut my losses and move on.

I was offered a student job as a office assistant the same day that Brandon told me he wasn't interested in a relationship.  After I got over the rejection from Brandon I decided I would just focus on school and work and not worry too much about dating.

Soon I decided that I wasn't that interested in focusing on school either.  I'd been trying to transfer to Utah State for ages, but now that I was finally there I just wasn't interested in the classes the way I thought I would be.  I was planning on majoring in Managerial Economics with a minor in Environmental Studies.  To complete all the requirements I would have to take 15-18 credits each semester for two years.  The idea seemed good on paper, but once I actually started to take the classes I decided that it wasn't so much fun.

Over General Conference weekend I decided to look into other majors to see if I could graduate any earlier.  (I also ate a ridiculous amount of Whopper Candy's, but that is beside the point.)  I discovered that I could drop my minor and switch my major to Pre-Law Economics.  I'd only have to take 12 credits each semester for 2 semesters and then 9 credits for a third semester.  I decided to take that route.   I wanted to be done with school so I could move on with my life.

I made another big decision around this same time.  My Dad worked for the company that owned the Inn at Temple Square.  The Inn was being demolished to make way for the City Creek Mall project.  Employees were given a chance to buy a room full of furniture.  I decided I wanted some of the furniture.  I bought a whole room and then my parents bought the queen size bed from me (because why would I need that).  That furniture turned out to be a great investment, and I still get complements on it.

I was dealing one other thing during the first little bit of October, and it was quite the emotional thing.  Four years earlier I'd started dating my high school boyfriend Anthony.  He'd been everything to me and we'd often talked about getting married one day.  But almost exactly two years after our first date we broke up.  I'd spent the last two years working on getting over him.  And I was over him . . . or so I thought.  He'd been a student at Utah State when we broke up and a lot of our final dates and later arguments had taken place in areas that I was now seeing daily.  I was constantly reminded of that part of my life.  Even the fall air felt the same.   Anthony's distant - yet major- rejection seemed amplified after Brandon's minor - but recent - one.

Fortunately for me I didn't have long to dwell on the past because Brandon decided to follow through on his promise that we could still be friends.

Brandon called me up during the day on Friday October 6th.  It'd been over a week since he'd told me he wasn't interested in a relationship, and I'd basically given up on hearing from him again.  I was so excited when I saw his number on my phone.  I was at work so I couldn't talk to him for very long, but I told him that I would be home by 5:30.

He came by my apartment after I got home.  He was there to drop off a flyer advertising a chance to be an extra in a movie his brother was making.  Brandon was in charge of recruiting people to be extras.  A few weeks earlier he'd asked me to be in the movie and I'd agreed.  I thought that was all he'd come over to my place to talk about, but then he casually asked me if I wanted to go to the Haunted Forest with him that night.

Normally I would have said no.  I don't like scary things and going to a haunted anything was not something I would enjoy.  But this was Brandon asking me out on a date!  I couldn't say no to that.  So I told him I'd be super scared and have to hold on to him the whole time.  He didn't see anything wrong with that.  Unfortunately, it started raining and so we decided not to go to the forest that night.  Instead we went to his apartment and watched a movie and played games.  Brandon didn't put his arm around me like he had before, but I was happy because he'd called me, come to my apartment, AND I had the promise of another date to the Haunted Forest.

But even those happy thoughts weren't enough to get me through the emotional issues I was having with remembering my break up with Anthony.  Our relationship had been deteriorating for several months before we finally broke up, but what really broke my heart was that he had a new girlfriend only a week after we were officially over.  The girl was someone we both knew from high school.  He always said he was just friends with her - and that was probably true - but it still broke my heart and tainted every memory I had with him.

So on the two year anniversary of the day I found out about his new girlfriend I couldn't help feeling sorry for myself.  I was really tempted to call Brandon and cry to him so he could make me feel better, but part of me didn't want his sympathy.

I ended up calling him.  He could tell something was wrong, and came over to talk to me.  I told him what was up.  Then he turned to me and said, "We should celebrate!  You're not with that guy anymore."  And then he took me out to eat at Burger King.  At one point he put his arm around me and told me that he loved me, not in a romantic way, but as a friend.  It was exactly what I needed.        

I talked or hung out with Brandon every day the rest of the week.  One night he took me out to the Logan Airport and showed me around, then we went to the Benson Marina and looked at the stars in the water, and finally we walked around downtown Logan.  (Yes all in one night.  I never wanted to go home because I never knew for sure when I would see him again. So we'd just keep coming up with things to do until one of us finally admitted that we needed to get some sleep before class or work the next day.)

On Friday we went on our date to the Haunted Forest.  We doubled with Marie and her boyfriend Jason.  Those two were practically engaged.  They kissed and cuddled and giggled the whole time we were in line.  Brandon and I were a lot more reserved.  Brandon had promised that he would hold on to me the whole time we were in the forest, but I didn't want him to think he had to hold me yet.

When it was our turn we found out that Marie and I would have to enter the forest first - without our dates.  As we went through the entrance something jumped out at us.  Marie completely freaked out.  She grabbed me, screamed, and froze on the spot.  I knew that I had to be the one to get us through this part.  So I pushed aside my own fear and walked with Marie through the rest of the entrance area.  She screamed the whole way. We were reunited with our dates and as promised Brandon immediately held me.  I was happy about that, but part of me knew I didn't need it.  I'd found my courage.

Still it was fun to hold hands with Brandon as we went through the rest of the forest.  He'd guide me along the path and then put his arm protectively around me when ever we came to a scary part.  At one point he let go of me and I panicked and said, "you're not touching me."  And then I thought, "did I really just say that?"

By the time we were done with the forest Brandon and I had completely broken the touch barrier again.  He kept his arm around me the whole way home.  The night was still young so Marie and Jason dropped us off at Brandon's apartment.  We decided to watch Back to the Future - and he held me close the whole time.  When that movie was over we put in the second movie and continued to cuddle.  I was kind of hoping for a kiss at the end of that movie, but as soon as it was over Brandon stood up, turned on the light, and announced it was time to take me home.  Which was just as well considering it was 3:00 am.

Despite our late night we were both up early the next day.  It was the day that Brandon's brother Bryan would be filming his movie.  Brandon was my ride to and from the Ellen Eccles Theater in down town Logan.  So I was there from start to finish.  The movie making process is incredibly tedious.  Bryan would set up a shot film it and then set up another shot.  About 12 people had shown up to be extras and Bryan kept moving us around to create the appearance of more people.  Brandon was an extra, but he helped Bryan with some of the technical stuff.

Brandon's friends, Brent and Laurie, were there as extras.  This was the first time I'd met them.  Brandon was good friends with their daughter Jana and they all thought the world of him.  I sat by Laurie as Brandon stood on stage and helped set things up.  Laurie kept commenting to me how handsome Brandon was,  "He could be a model."  She said.  "Oh I know," I thought.

We finished the main part of the filming, but since Brandon was my ride home I stayed with him while Bryan finished getting some more shots.  Bryan decided he wanted a few more shots from the crowd's perspective so he used Brandon and me.  I wondered if Brandon had mentioned me at all to Bryan.  But soon I could tell that he hadn't.  Bryan could not remember my name.  He called me every V name there was, Vicky, Vivian, Veronica, Vanessa, etc but not Valerie.  

Here is a clip from the final movie.  The back of my head made it into a lot of shots.    

Brandon took me home when we were done filming.  He went back to his place and hung out with Bryan and his friend Jake.  I'd been hoping to get invited over too, but he didn't invite me.  Later, after they left, he called me up and invited me over to finish our Back to the Future marathon.  He put his arm around me again.

I found a reason to see Brandon every day the next week.  One night I had a cold and went to his house to get some Vitamin C.  Another day, I kid you not, my bathroom ceiling caved in and I went to his house while the construction crew fixed it up.  Two days later it caved in again (no joke) and so I was back over at his apartment.

Hanging out with Brandon was always worth it.  We would do homework, watch movies, cook dinner, go on walks, or just talk.  I loved talking with Brandon.  One night he told me all about what he didn't like about his mission.   I was used to hearing guys brag about how they were the Assistant to the President or how they had so many baptisms.  It was so refreshing to hear him give an honest opinion about how ineffective tracting was or how he hated street contacting.

The Friday after we helped with the movie was a day off of school.  Brandon invited me to go flying with him and his instructor.  His instructor brought a date as well.  Brandon flew the four of us from the Logan airport to the Ogden airport and back. Along the way we passed over the Great Salt Lake and the Pineview Reservoir.  Brandon even showed me the property where his parents planned to build their dream house.  I was so impressed that he knew how to fly an airplane.  I wrote in my journal that if we got married I wanted our engagement photos to be taken with an airplane.

The next day my parents came into town to see my brother Billy compete in a marching band competition.  My friend Amy and I were helping out with the competition so I was busy most of the day, but I was hoping to have Brandon meet my parents at some point.  Instead Brandon went to a bonfire up the canyon with some friends and didn't even invite me.  I didn't know how to interpret that.

Brandon was the ward activity chairman and so was in charge of a linger longer lunch every month.  That Sunday was a "Parents Day" linger longer and parents were invited to come to the single's ward with their kids and then stay for lunch afterward.  Brandon was very busy with all the details of the dinner, but he found a minute to introduce me to his mom and dad.  He told them that I'd gone flying with him that weekend.

Brandon and I continued to hang out just about every day.  I even consented to get up early and go on a bike ride with him one morning.  I told him, "Just so you know, I really like you, because I wouldn't get on a bike otherwise."

I knew that he still didn't want a serious relationship, but I could tell that his resolve was cracking.  One night we went for a walk to the mall.  He helped me over a curb and then kept holding my hand.  As we walked into the mall he was still holding my hand.  I asked him, "Are you ready for that much commitment?" Meaning, "do you really want to be seen holding my hand in public?"  He looked down at our hands and saw that our fingers were laced together in the "love lock."  He thought I was referring to the way we were holding hands and so he shifted his hand so that he was just holding my hand the regular way.  I didn't bring it up again.

Another night he held me close and gave me a teasing  kiss on the end of my nose.  I could tell he wanted to kiss me for real, but I pulled away before he could.  I wanted him to be absolutely sure he wanted to kiss me.

And on another night he kissed my forehead when he dropped me off at my apartment.  Then he tapped on my bedroom window and waved to me one last time.  He later confessed to me that as he walked away he thought, "For not liking her, you are doing a terrible job."

Brandon went home for the weekend the last weekend of October.  I knew that he was going, but he didn't really say goodbye.  He didn't call me that whole weekend either.  I kept busy by going to Halloween parties with my friends, but I was preoccupied with thoughts of Brandon all weekend.  Did he really like me? Or was I just convenient because I was always around?  Did his brother and his parents like what they saw in me?  Or were they spending the weekend talking him out of a relationship?  Did he even tell them how much time he spent with me?  

So as the month ended I was still not sure if my relationship with Brandon was going anywhere.  I wanted it to, but I didn't know what his thoughts were.

Click here to find out what happened next.