November 14-19 Then and Now

Last Sunday night I stayed up reading this blog. I'd suspected all week that the calendar was EXACTLY like it had been 6 years ago when we were preparing to leave Fort Rucker. The whole Veterans Day on a Friday just felt oddly familiar. So I checked this blog and yes, the calendar was exactly the same. I also verified the dates that we left Fort Rucker and started traveling back west. I never could quite remember when we did that because we'd left at midnight.  So it was good to check those dates. 

All week I had little flashes of "6 years ago we were doing this today."  And because I wrote a blog post for each day of our drive back to Utah I actually can share with you what we were doing each day.  I'll include those little snippets as we talk about this week. 

Before this week started I was talking to my friend Kaymie and said something like, "It's an easy week. I only have like one appointment a day."  And then we laughed because only mom's can say something crazy like that and be absolutely serious. 

At the end of the week I thought, "oh I wasn't very busy this week."

But that's a lie. It WAS a busy week. Even one extra appointment a day is still A LOT. 

So let's look back over this crazy week.

Sunday was the Primary Program for our ward. Here's a picture of Derrick and Veronica all dressed up for the program. 

No, I didn't forget to upload a picture. There actually is no picture because they weren't in the Primary Program. 

They haven't participated in a Primary Program since 2019. When everything shut down in 2020 and even church was cancelled I realized that a lot of good things are also optional. And the Primary Program was one of those good, yet optional things. Derrick's participation had always been tenuous and Veronica literally had a panic attack on stage in 2019 so I didn't feel like forcing them into the program. They both chose not to be in it again this year.

Monday. November 14th 2022 was exactly six years since Monday November 14th 2016 when we signed out of our house on Fort Rucker. (If you want to go back and read all about that day you can click here.)

All day on Monday I kept getting a little sentimental for that house and life in Alabama. It's funny because almost everything about my life is better now than it was in Alabama. Like Brandon actually has a consistent schedule these days.  Or how the Alabama house only had a one car garage and we have a two car garage now. We have a bigger backyard and a whole basement now too. But I still get all sentimental about the Army and that house. (It did have a master bathroom as big as my current kitchen so that might have something to do with it.)

I think Alabama just symbolized so much. And it was hard to leave all that behind. Anyway, here's a picture of that wonderful house at 33 Endl Ave. 

And here we are (with the neighbor's dog too)  Look at those little kids. 

I got everyone off to school and then went to work. I left work around 12:00 and went home for a quick lunch. 

At 1:00 I drove over to the park and met up with some other PTO Mom's for the big event of the day. Our PTO had been doing a Butterbraid Fundraiser and today was the day everyone could come pick up their orders.  This has been a HUGE project that has been overseen by a wonderful mom named Monica. I'm so glad she took this one because there is no way I would have had time for it.  

I was able to help with this last day though. I made sure to write out the check for what we owed Butterbraids. When I got to the park one of the co-presidents signed it.  I had it all ready when the delivery guys asked for it. 

The Butterbraids truck was there delivering all the orders.  They had everything organized really well. The boxes were labeled with the child's name that sold the orders.  So it would be like, Veronica Illguth 1 of 8. (Just kidding, she only "sold" two so she just had a small order that wasn't even in a box.) Then each kid was assigned a number.  Veronica was something like 33.  There were 79 orders in total and they lined the whole section of fence. 

 

After school got out parents drove over to the park and picked up their orders.  I was in charge of greeting the parents, asking the name of their child's teacher and the childs last name.  I'd find them on a list and find out what their order number was.  I'd call out something like, "Number 53."  Then one of the PTO dads and his sons would find order Number 53.  They'd bring it to the car. Meanwhile Monica and her teenage daughter would find the original order form and give it back to the parent so they could know who'd ordered what. 

It was quite the process, but we got the hang of it. 

The kid who sold the most has sold 108 Butterbraids.  Monica said, "how did he do that? I don't even know 108 people."  Turns out he'd asked a bunch of his mom's bowling friends. 

After the initial rush things slowed down a lot. The other PTO helpers gradually left. It was just me and Monica there for about the last hour. We'd been warm when things were crazy, but we were getting colder. 

Monica started calling people to let them know that their orders were ready.  That got a few more people there.  But when the pick up officially ended at 4:30 there were still about 8 unclaimed orders.  Monica took them home and would continue to try to contact people throughout the week.  She finally got the last ones to the correct people on Thursday. I told her she doesn't have to help with ANYTHING with the PTO for the rest of the year. 

All in all we had a profit of over $7000 from the fundraiser.  But WOW, it was a lot of work. 

I went home and was so happy to be in a warm house. Brandon and the kids were all happy. Brandon and Lydia were making dinner. Derrick was like, "Where were you mom?"

Now let's talk about Tuesday November 15th, 2022 (And because we can, here's the post from this same day in 2016. We went mini-golfing on our last full day in Alabama.)

I'm sure you are SUPER curious what a Butterbraid is. So was I. Last year someone told me and Java/PTO Liz that Butterbraids were a great fundraiser.  We both were like, "what's a butterbraid?"

So this year when we actually did the fundraiser I bought one for me and one for Java/PTO Liz.  PTO ended up ordering extras to give out to our helpers. So I was able to bring a few extra home.  I decided to open up one of the Butterbraids on Tueday.  

Basically is frozen dough in a cool braid shape.  There are different flavors inside.  This one was apple.  The instructions said to let it thaw/rise for 8-12 hours.  So I opened it in the morning.  

I walked with Derrick to school. Veronica stayed home because she had a doctors appointment a little later that morning. Here she is hugging Marcia.  Marcia's eyes say, "Why aren't you at school?"

Veronica and I took Charlotte and Lydia to school. The middle school drop off is SUPER stressful and everything that I've been avoiding for years. (When we were bus riders in Alabama and Pocatello I NEVER let the kids miss the bus because I didn't want to deal with the drop off.) 

These days I can deal with the stress and craziness okay though.  The key is just to be patient.  Well this day I had to be REALLY patient. I pulled in close behind a big SUV. Charlotte and Lydia got out and I was hoping the big SUV would move soon so I could keep moving. But the SUV didn't move. I was too close to them to pull out without hitting them. And I couldn't back up because the car behind me was right on my bumper.  That car couldn't move because the car behind them was super close too.  Normally this isn't a problem. We were all just waiting for that SUV to move.  But it kept sitting there.  

I was like, "Are they having breakfast in there?" Eventually one kid got out and I was like, "Okay, now this traffic jam can get moving."  But NO they just kept sitting there. Eventually another kid got out followed by a third.  I really hope whatever the hold up was about was important because WOW that was inconsiderate. 

Veronica kept asking me if we were going to be late.  I told her, "No, the doctors office is less than a mile a way and we have plenty of time."

We got to the doctors office, and were soon in the exam room.  While we were waiting for the doctor Veronica started asking me about what if she got coal for Christmas.  She was genuinely concerned about it.  I was like, "Veronica, I don't know a single kid that has ever got coal for Christmas."  But she was still worried that it could happen to her. 

Veronica's appointment was for a follow up on the ADHD evaluations that me and her school teacher had filled out. The doctor came in and went over the results.  He said something like, "She doesn't score high for possible ADHD. But she does score high for Anxiety. There's another assessment I'd like to do while you are here."

So we did that assessment and the whole time I was like, "Yes she does that. Yes she worries about that. Yes that's a concern."

Then Veronica answered similar questions.  

And at the end Veronica had a Generalized Anxiety Diagnosis.  

I was simultaneously thinking, "What?" and "Oh that makes SOOOO much sense."

Actually I'm kind of surprised that this is our first GAD diagnosis because I can think of several other people in our house (me included) that could probably meet the requirements. 

Anyway, looking back over the school year I can totally see that Veronica has been dealing with heightened anxiety levels. She was so scared on the first day of school. She's always concerned about fire drills. The day of one of the lock down drills Veronica was so scared to even go into school, I had to find the school counselor and have her help Veronica. (She gave her a stuffed animal to squeeze.) Veronica literally had a panic attack the week before about something she thought was poisonous on her shoe. 

At home Veronica is always worried about far off future things like how she's going to find an apartment when she's a grown up.  

So yeah looking back this has definitely been a thing. And it explains her learning problems. The doctor put it best when he said, "you can't learn if you are constantly worrying about things."

So what are we doing about it?

Good question. I'm meeting with the school after the break to talk about some things we can do. They've already brought up the words 504 plan and I'm SUPER happy about that. I also really need to pull out a resource my boss gave me to help with Derrick's emotions. (It helps to work with therapists.) I think it will help Veronica too. 

After the appointment I took Veronica to Mcdonalds for a cinnamon roll because apparently that's a thing we do now. 

Then I went home and took care of some PTO accounting stuff. I was hoping to get to do some accounting for the RV business, but I ran out of time. 

I went to work and covered the front desk for a few hours and then went home.

When I got home I walked into the house and saw that Brandon, Derrick, and Veronica had figured out how to get the pellet stove in our living room working.  This thing has been a mystery for the 3 years we've lived here. Brandon has looked at it a few times but could never quite figure it out. We'll I guess 4th winter is the charm. He noticed (or maybe Veronica noticed) a plug for the first time. They plugged the stove in and Voila! It worked!

In other things that took 3 years to figure out, I'd finally figured out how to organize this little cubby space. I ordered a paper organizer and put all of our paper on that.  I also bought a card organizer for all the birthday and Christmas cards I have. 

Oh and look at this!  Here's the butterbraid after it was done rising and baked. Brandon put icing on it right after this picture and then we ate it.  It was good, but I kind of felt like I could do the same thing with Rhodes dough. 

Now we are onto Wednesday. On Wednesday November 16, 2016 Brandon sighed out of Fort Rucker at midnight and we drove away from Alabama starting at 1:00 am. We spent 16 hours driving and ended the day in Missouri. Here's the post about that day.   

Wednesday November 16, 2022 was not as momentous.  But car things happened so that's kind of the same. Brandon took the van to work and I took the Pilot.  The Pilot needed an oil change and Brandon just hadn't had time to do it.  So after work I took it to Jiffy Lube.  

While I was there the technician said there was a leak in something or other and recommended where I could take it.  I was like "okay, I'll call them right when I get home."  

And then I remembered my foot. I'd called a podiatrist earlier in the week to FINALLY do something about my foot that's been hurting on and off since March.  But I'd called during the lunch hour so I just left a message.  And I was busy when they called me back and I'd never got around to calling again. 

So then I told myself, "Valerie, you CANNOT call that mechanic until you have an appointment with the podiatrist."  So when I got home I called the podiatrist and made an appt for sometime in early December. And then I called the mechanic and made an appt for December 1st. 

So even though the Pilot is getting looked at before my foot I did make the foot appointment first.  

That afternoon I finally got around to doing accounting stuff for the RV business.  It's funny because when I went back to school for my accounting degree I was like, "I don't know why, but I feel like I need to get this."  I had no idea that I'd need it for my own business.

That night I was driving the van again. I had to take Charlotte and Lydia to Young Womens. It was at a leaders house who lives just one subdivision over from us. An hour later I went to pick them up again. I parked the car and went into the house. And then I came out with the girls, started the car, and drove the short distance home. 

I know that sounds trivial, but it's actually kind of important for the next day. 

Thursday was a busy day. Both in 2016 and in 2022. In 2016 it was the day we visited places where Laura Ingalls Wilder lived as an adult and as a small child.  Here's the post about that day. 

In 2022 it was a busy day thanks to the PTO. Kaymie gave me one of her quick rides home from the elementary school. She asked me, "what do you have today?"  I was like, "Well first I have a district PTO meeting at 9:30 and then at 11:00 I'm selling apparel at the PTO table during the Thanksgiving Lunch at the school."

She was like, "good luck with all that!"

I got out of her car and noticed that my van was completely iced over. I figured I'd turn it on and get it warming up for a few minutes before I drove Charlotte and Lydia to the middle school. Then I'd go to work for a little bit before heading over to the district offices for the meeting. 

The plan all came crashing down when the van didn't start. 

It's had trouble starting for a while, but usually on the third try the engine turns over and we are good to go.  But this time it wouldn't crank. After a few tries I think the battery got flooded and it wouldn't start. At least I think that's what was happening. The Pilot has been so reliable that I don't know the jargon for problems with starting cars. 

I gave the battery some time to do whatever it does to un-flood and went inside to do my make up.  I was hoping that I could get it started, but I didn't want to cut things close with getting the girls to school. I texted Kaymie to see if she could take the girls along with her son. She said yes.  And then because she is one of the best people ever she said, "If it doesn't start you can take one of my cars to your meeting."  

I went to try to start the car and it made noises like it was trying.  But then the car started clicking.  Charlotte was with me.  She was like, "what's that noise?"  I told her, "Oh that means the battery is completely dead." Once again, the Pilot has been so reliable that Charlotte has no memory of ever hearing the sound of a dead battery before. I chalked this up to an important life lesson. 

I was pretty certain what had happened. I'd started the car three times the night before and had only driven a short distance each time.  There hadn't been time for the battery to recharge.  Add in a sub-zero night and the fact that the battery wasn't super reliable to begin with and it was a perfect recipe for a dead battery. 

Kaymie came to pick up the girls and get them to school.  I stayed home and was able to work from home.  Then at 9:15 I walked over to Kaymie's and borrowed her car.  I can't say enough about how awesome Kaymie is.  She's not the type to do PTO stuff, but she is the type of supportive friend that helps me do my PTO stuff. I kept telling her, "You saved the day."

I was able to make it to the district PTO meeting and participate in discussions about the upcoming school levi and the proposed calendar for the next school year. I was also able to report on the good things happening at our Elementary school. 

I had to duck out of the meeting early and zip over to the Elementary School.  This was the day of the Thanksgiving Lunch.  This was one of my favorite days in 2019 and I was happy it was back after a hiatus during COVID. Since so many parents would be in the building I wanted to have some apparel on sale during the lunch.  

Lindsay, one of the co-presidents, took care of setting up the table so it was all ready when I got there. (The original plan was for Lindsay to go to the meeting and for me to set up the table. But she has 3 year old twins so it made more sense for me to go to the meeting while she set up the table.) I'd texted sooooo many people hoping to find 2 or 3 other people who could help sell things.  I wanted enough people that we could stagger times so we could eat with our kids.  I heard back from a lot of people that their kids were sick and so they couldn't make it to the lunch. But I did have Lindsay and a lady named Melissa helping.  We were able to stagger and eat with our kids. 

Here's the table with the merch. We ended up selling quite a few hats and almost all the shirts. 

Veronica's class went to lunch and I jumped in line with her.  She showed me how to get the silverware, a napkin, and a plate. Then we went through the lunch lady line and got food like stuffing, green beans, a roll, and turkey chunks on top of mashed potatoes. The school Principal was service pieces of a spice cake.  I told her, "I LOVE this day! I'm so happy it's back."

Veronica and I ate together. I liked all the food.  I was happy to be there with Veronica, but I was a little sad when I thought about the last time we'd done this.  She'd been in Kindergarten in 2019. We'd both come to eat with the other three kids.  Somehow their lunches all overlapped well enough that we all ate together.  It had been so much fun for the 5 of us to share a meal at their school. 

Actually the memory from 2019 showed up in my Facebook feed today.  Here it is:

Sometimes I wonder if I should take a break from doing so much for the PTO.  But then I remember how short these elementary school years are - especially for someone like me who has kids close in age. Charlotte and Lydia are already in Middle School. This is Derrick's last year of elementary. Then there will just be two more years of Veronica at the elementary school.  And then it's over forever. I want to do PTO while I can.  

My phone was running the square payments app so I left it with the table when I went into the lunch room to eat with Veronica. We took a selfie together when we were done eating. 

Lindsay took this picture of us. 

A little bit later it was Derrick's turn to eat.  Since I'd already eaten with Veronica I just went into the lunch room after Derrick had his food. I knew he was in there but I couldn't see him at all. Finally one of the para's pointed him out to me.  He'd been like 10 feet in front of me the whole time. 

Here's our after lunch picture. 

Lunch wound down and the last of the parents left the building.  We cleaned up the table and put everything away.  Then I drove Kaymie's car back to her house. 

I went home and grabbed my stuff for work. It was about 1:30 by this point and I considered waiting for Brandon to get home and 2:00 and then driving to work.  But I had a ton of energy and I didn't want to wait around the house.  So I started walking to work.  Usually when I walk somewhere I listen to a podcast.  But after a crazy morning of talking and talking and listening, and talking some more I realized it was nice to just listen to my footsteps. 

I got to work and was so happy to be in my tiny, quiet office. I calmed down from all the excitement from the day and then came way down. I got more and more tired as I worked. When I was done I considered clocking out and then taking a nap on the couch in my office. Instead I texted Brandon and asked him to pick me up. He did and we took the PTO money to the bank.  

I was super quiet in the car.  I told Brandon, "I'm all talked out." I do a good job of pretending to be an extrovert. But I'm very much an introvert. (My mom says I'm a loud introvert and my sister Lindsey is a quiet extrovert.) This was one of those times that my introvert battery got completely depleted.  When we got home I disappeared into my room and read a book for a long time. 

Brandon took care of charging up the battery in the van again.  He looked at it and said, "That battery is from 2017. It's probably bad."  I made a mental note to get the battery replaced soon. 

Alright we've made it to Friday.  In 2016 this was the day we did a lot of sightseeing in Kansas. Oddly enough the Pilot battery needed a jump on this day. I think that might have been the last time the Pilot had a dead battery. You can read all about it here.  In 2022 this was the last school day before the Thanksgiving break. AND it was one of those rare calendar days with NOTHING on it. 

Nothing on the calendar didn't mean I had nothing to do though.  I still had work in the morning.  I got a lot done so I wouldn't have to do as much during the break.  

When I was done with work I went grocery shopping. We are planning a really low key Thanksgiving this year, but as I went shopping I was like, "Oh wait, I do want stuffing." Or "We'll maybe we'll have a few yams."  So I bought a bit more Thanksgiving types of foods than I'd been planning to. 

I got home from the store and as always happens I was just so sick of all that food. Don't get me wrong.  I'm super grateful to have it all, but after picking it out in the store, carting it around the store, putting it on the conveyer belt, bagging it, putting it back into the cart, pushing the cart to the car, putting it all into the car, driving it home, and then bringing it into the house I'm ready to be done with it.  So I put away the perishable stuff and left the rest of it out for Brandon to take care of. 

Derrick and Veronica came home from school and a little while later Charlotte and Lydia came home.  We were all SUPER happy to be done with school for the next 10 days. 

We were also all super excited for dinner that night. We were going to have an "End of Season Dinner" to celebrate a successful first season for the RV Winterization business. The business has officially existed since July, but things really took off during the last few weeks of October/first few weeks of November. I figured we needed to celebrate that and include the kids.  

We wanted to go somewhere the kids have never been, but we still wanted to stay with fast food because well because that's just the phase of life we are in. So we picked Carl's Jr. We ordered our food and while we waited for it I read off our total revenue and our total expenses for the last 5 months. Then I explained that if you subtract expenses from revenue you get profit.  

The food arrived and we all had a good time eating. This was a very happy meal. Everyone was in really good moods.  I was feeling super present. Usually I'm thinking of what I need to do next, but there really was no next. Just now. I kept rubbing my cheeks and noticed how soft they were. I never notice stuff like that. It was a good feeling. 

Every one liked the fries and the root beer. (Of course) Charlotte and Lydia didn't really like the burgers, but Derrick loved them.  He ate his and then half of Charlotte's. Here he is showing how much he liked it. 

Things got a little crazy toward the end. Veronica mixed sprite and rootbeer. Brandon tasted it and said it tasted like a hospital. We all laughed really loud.  Derrick and Veronica wanted to thumb wrestle with me. Since this was Carl's Jr all this was all just fine. 

I'm hoping the business continues to do well and we can continue to do End of Season dinners every spring and fall. This was the start to a great tradition. 

We went home and watched X-Men First Class. The kids were a little thrown off by the whole new cast of younger versions of the characters they knew well. But they got used to it and enjoyed the movie. 

Then Brandon and I stayed up and watched The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent with Nicholas Cage playing a washed up version of himself. It was HILARIOUS, but if swear words bother you, you should definitely watch this one filtered. 

Here's the trailer because it's just so fun. 

Here we are on Saturday November 19th. In 2016 This was the day we drove into Colorado and the kids all experienced snow for the first time in a while.  Read the post here.  In 2022 it was the third Saturday in row where we had NOTHING to do. No plays, no trips, nothing.  Just getting the house cleaned up and then relaxing. 

We'd sucessfully kept the house pretty clean all week so it didn't take long to get the house done.  I cleaned my bathroom for a third week in a row which is probably some sort of record for me.  

Brandon took the kids outside and put them to work picking up dog poop and raking leaves. I took this picture through my bedroom window, but I joined them later. 

I was finishing a little project in the house.  I organized the linen closet. The biggest thing I did was put all the sheets and pillowcases into the closet organizer divider things.  I'd bought these for Charlotte and Lydia's pants, but they didn't like them so I put them to use here.  I can't believe how much they helped.  I still need to do something with the blankets on the top shelf, but that's a project for another day. 

After everything was clean I took Charlotte shopping.  She has an orchestra concert coming up so we needed to buy some clothes for that. We were going to take the van, but it wouldn't start for me again. So we took the Pilot. 

After Charlotte and I got back I told Brandon, "I need a new battery by the end of the day."  

He joked, "Well let me teach you how to charge it. You charge it by taking the dead one to Autozone and buying a new one."

So we went to Autozone and bought a new battery.  Here's Brandon putting it in. Brandon is the best

That night we watched X-Men Days of Future Past. All our X-Men viewing has lead to this.  The kids were super excited because this was the one with Quicksiver.  They've seen the scene with him and laughed at it every time.  This time when it came on in the movie Lydia was like, "Oh now I know who all these other guys are!"

I was excited because this movie is my favorite out of the whole series.  It fixes the mistakes of The Last Stand. I literally cried in the movie theatre when I saw this movie. 

The kids didn't quite appreciate it for the cinematic masterpiece that it was.  I think part of the problem is that they watched all 5 movies in the span of a month.  They didn't have time to wonder and anticipate between movies. Later I told Brandon, "The X-men franchise was an important part of who I was in my childhood, in my teens, and in my 20s. The kids have no idea what that's like yet."

Well that gets us caught up now.  I'll include Sunday in my post about Thanksgiving. 

So thanks for reading and have a Happy Thanksgiving.