Winter of my discontent

This has been one of the hardest January's of my life.  

Not the hardest one - that title  belongs to January 2013 when we'd just moved to Texas. all of our stuff was still in transit, we had no money in the bank, Brandon was sent to NTC, and I found out I was pregnant with Veronica.  That January will always be the hardest.

But this one is up there.  

Basically it boils down to the fact that it's hard living with other people.  Even when they are super nice and accommodating like my in-laws.

And as you can see from the title of this post, the weather isn't helping anything either.  It's been snowing a lot up here. As someone who has LOVED the mild southern winters I'm not exactly thrilled to be living in a snow globe.  I feel trapped indoors.  Trapped in a house that isn't mine.  

Leaving the house - especially with children - is an ordeal of putting on coats, boots, and gloves.  Then we have to navigate stairs down to the drive way.  My in-laws keep it as clear as they can, but it's a gravel driveway so it's never completely clear.  Sometimes it's icy.  Sometimes its full of snow.  For a few days it was full of slushy soup-like melty snow.  Walking to the car is always an ordeal of trying to get the kids to actually get into the car and sit in their seats.  When they are wearing their gloves none of the kids can buckle their own seat belts so Brandon and I have to help with that.  Then it's time to clear snow off the car.  Finally we turn on the car and try to back out of the drive way.  In the jeep, with it's 4 wheel drive, we usually don't have much trouble getting out.  But the Honda is another story.  So far it hasn't ever been stuck, but there have been some close calls.  But we have to do it or stay in the house and go crazy.

Another problem is that I'm incredibly lonely.  We've been here for two months and I don't have a single new friend from the neighborhood or ward.  The people here have been nice and welcoming, but they see us as temporary and therefore haven't spent much time getting to know us.  I miss the Army Wife Culture where everyone makes friends almost right away no matter how long or short you will be staying in one place.  A few weeks ago in Relief Society we sang "We are all enlisted til the conflict is over." The word enlisted made me think of the army which made me think of all my friends and that made me cry.  Last time I cried during a song in Relief Society was several months ago back in Fort Rucker. I was sitting next to my dear friend Deb who put her arm around me.  But this time there was no one there.  And that made me cry more.  

I do have a wealth of good friends that live in my phone.  Facebook and texting have been great lifelines to remind me that I do have many meaningful relationships - even if we can't talk face to face.  

Fortunately, I also have a best friend who can sympathize.  My very best friend Ashley recently moved nearby.  Her husband joined the Army a few years before Brandon did and Ashley and I always hoped that we'd get stationed in the same place.  Well that never happened.  Instead our husband's ended up getting out of the Army one month apart, and we both moved back to Utah.  Ashley did the "move-in-with-the-in-laws" routine until they could buy a house.  That house is only about 40 minutes away from where I am.  And so on Saturday I went down to visit with her.  

It was so great to see her.  We've been friends since we were nine years old.  We've always had a lot in common, but right now we really have a lot in common.  We were able to share our feelings about leaving Army culture, living with in-laws, adjusting to snow after living in the south, making our children go to three schools in one school year, buying vs renting, and everything else that's been on our minds. Gosh I needed that talk. It's so good to know that I'm not the only one going through this transition.     

Somehow just having someone to talk to made me feel better about everything. 

Another thing that has kept me sane this month has been my job.  Things have slowed down since New Year's, but I still like my job.  It's nice to have somewhere to go four days a week.  I'd probably be really crazy if I didn't have my job.

Since things are less busy these days I actually get out of work when its still light outside.  I'm always so impressed by how beautiful the mountain is. Half our road trips last year were to "mountains."  The tallest place we went was Clingman's Dome at 6644 feet above sea level. And now I work at 6,391 feet above sea level and the mountain goes up above 9000 feet.

And of course there have been lots of fun little things that have been going on during the last few weeks. 

Probably one of the biggest things has been that Lydia lost two teeth.  I missed both times, but she excitedly showed me the gaps in her mouth when I came home from work.    

When I was a kid my dad would always call the tooth fairy and tell her that I'd lost a tooth.  It was always funny to hear him give detailed directions on how to find our house and which bedroom I slept in.  Then invariably the tooth fairy would FORGET to come that night and my dad would call up the tooth fairy and chew her out.  I'm sure this was by accident the first time, but it turned into a really funny routine.  He'd make threats such as, "there are other tooth fairy services that we can switch to if you can't get your act together."  Then the tooth fairy would come that night. 

Brandon must have had a tooth fairy from one of those other services.  His tradition was that they would put the tooth in an envelope and write "to the tooth fairy" on it..  When he woke up the next morning the envelope would still be sealed but there would be money and a roll of life savers inside.  

When Lydia lost her first tooth we had to decide what our tradition would be.  Basically we just combined them.  I called the tooth fairy and made sure that she knew that Lydia no longer lived in Alabama.  I also made sure she understood that Lydia went to sleep in one room, but that we moved her into another room where she slept all night.  I told the tooth fairy that Lydia always slept between Charlotte and Veronica.  Then Brandon took care of buying the Lifesavers and then steaming open the envelope that Lydia had left under her pillow.  

Lydia was so excited when she woke up the next morning and found 50 cents and the life savers under her pillow.  She later told us that she'd felt the tooth fairy dancing on her face. 

A few days later she lost her other tooth.  We went through the same routine, but we actually almost forgot to do it.  I can see why my dad had to call up the tooth fairy and yell at her for forgetting to do her job so often. 

Last week Brandon and I realized that the kids were getting a four day weekend for Martin Luther King Day.  I had to work on Friday, but I'd have the other three days off.  We tried coming up with something to do.  At first I wanted to go out to Lehman Caves at the Great Basin National Monument on the Utah/Nevada border.  But then I remember that there is this whole snow thing that happens here and that maybe a 4 hour road trip wasn't the best thing to plan in January.  

After trying to figure out a good winter activity I finally decided that we should visit some of the buildings in down town Salt Lake City.  So that's what we did on Saturday. 

Our first stop was the state capitol.  We've been to the capitol buildings of Texas and Alabama and so the kids were excited to see the one for Utah.  

They had lots of fun climbing up the stairs and looking over the railings in the building.

Here I am hanging out.

The kids on the stairs.

This place is so big.  Last time we were here was when Derrick was only a few weeks old.

We had fun riding the elevator.  The front of it was glass so we could see the floors go by as we went up and down.  Veronica was afraid of it so Brandon stayed with her.

The weather was fairly warm so we went outside and looked at the reflecting pool outback. I had my bridal photos taken here almost 10 years ago.

The kids through it was cool to look out over the city skyline.

Then we walked around to the front and got a good look at the capitol.

Everyone wanted to pose in in front of the capitol.

Here's Charlotte.

There is a path lined with cherry trees that runs around the whole area.  I bet this place is amazing in the spring.

After the capitol we got back into the car and drove down into the heart of the city.  We parked by the Conference Center and then walked over to the trax station.  We were going to take the train to get to the next few buildings.  Ever since Derrick went on trax around Christmas time he's been asking to go on another train ride.  We've been answering that he could go on the train when he wore underwear every day.  Part of me thought that he was only hearing, "go on a train ride every day."  But he actually was making a lot of progress with the potty training that Brandon had been doing with him and Veronica.  So we figured he deserved a little train ride as a reward.

We went to the Clark Planetarium first. Brandon had brought the kids here after Christmas and they were all excited to show it to me. We spent a lot of time looking at the big ball drop.

Brandon had bought the kids a giant thing of popcorn for $3 last time.  So everyone wanted to do that again. 

 The planetarium was really fun.  We liked the part that was set up like it a a moon of Jupiter.

 After the planetarium we got back onto the train and went over to the City and County Building.  I was hoping that we'd be able to get inside this building, but it's closed on Saturdays.

So instead we went to the library.

The first thing we did was ride the glass elevators up and down.

As with the other elevator the three oldest kids loved it.  Charlotte had been really grumpy before we even left the house.  She kept telling us that she didn't want to leave the house.  Well she'd forgotten all about that by the this point.  She happily yelled, "Is this my BIRTHDAY!  I LOVE elevators!"

Veronica was not happy at first, but she gradually got used to it.  By the end she was enjoying the elevator as much as anyone.

Then we went to the childrens area.  The kids played with the little hands on things.

Every good library has one of these bead toys.  

Brandon and I enjoyed the chance to relax while the kids were entertained.

After a while we decided to walk up the staircase and get a view of the library from there.

We also had a little snack down in the main area.  And we rode the elevator several more times.  There were some teenagers also riding the elevators and we kept running into our "elevator friends."

After that we caught the train and went to the City Creek Center.  The kids loved standing on the walkway over the trains.

They also liked the fountain.

But they REALLY loved the escalators.  They are so amazed by these.

Then it was back to the sky bridge for more train watching.

On the other side of the mall we looked down into the creek and noticed that there was fish in the water.

We went down to look at those for a while.  Charlotte wanted to catch one, but she couldn't give us a good answer when we asked her what she would do after she caught it.

The kids had done amazing with all the walking we'd done that day.  They got a little whiny on the way back to the car, but nothing bad.  It had been a great day.  

The next day we had a family dinner with Brandon's sister that lives near by.  We had a ham.  We told Derrick it was hot dogs and he ate a lot of it. I was very impressed.  

 On Monday I took Lydia on a "Mommy and Lydia Day."  Charlotte and I had done one the Monday before.  She helped me pick out my belated Christmas Presents of sweaters and other long sleeved shirts at Savers.  While we were there we found out that they were having a 50% off sale on Martin Luther King Day.  So Lydia and I went there and bought six new dresses for her and Charlotte.

 After modeling their new dresses the girls put on their winter gear and I took them to the Elementary School so they could play on the large snow piles there.

 They had a blast climbing and sliding and jumping around. I think we were there for over 2 hours.

Jacque gave Charlotte and Lydia cute little birds for Christmas.  They wanted a cage to go with them and I told them that Daddy could probably make them a cage.  Boy did he deliver.  

 Here's Lydia showing off the cage. (And Veronica photo bombing with her newly acquired potty training pull ups.

 Even after we took Derrick on the train he kept asking to "ride on a train."  So I told him that we would take him on a "big long train" when he wore underwear every day.  He repeated that a lot, but I'm not sure it sunk in.

Well on Thursday he opened up his underwear drawer and said, "Wear underwear all the time go on big long train."  He picked out a pair of underwear, handed it to me, and wanted to wear it.

I wasn't so sure about that.  He's been doing great about peeing on the potty when we tell him to, and I know he can hold it, but I wasn't sure if he was ready for underwear.  But I figured since it was his idea we might as well go with it.

So Brandon and I made sure Derrick sat on the potty every 15 minutes.  He did fine with that.  Then it was time to go to school.  Brandon packed backup clothes in Derrick's backpack and I wrote his teacher a note telling her that Derrick wanted to wear underwear.  When Brandon dropped Derrick off he told the teacher that Derrick was in underwear.  I think we were all expecting Derrick to have an accident.  But instead he went the whole day in the same pair of underwear.  Brandon said that Derrick even ran to the potty on his own at one point. It was amazing.

The next day he did the same thing.  And the next, and the next.  He still hasn't figured out pooping on the potty and he had one accident while playing in the snow, but gosh I'm willing to declare a major victory.  I'm taking him on Frontrunner tomorrow for our "Mommy and Derrick day."

In hindsight I'm not surprised at all.  Derrick has done this with just about every milestone.  He waits until he absolutely ready and then he crushes it.    

Derrick has also discovered that he loves playing in the snow.  He asks to play in the snow every day.  He loves getting all bundled up.  He'll spend almost and hour just running around and sliding on his bum.  Veronica likes it too.  She calls her boots her "boops" and it's just about the cutest thing ever.  Here they are playing.

 They like to slide down the little hill that leads to the basement door.

And here is some really recent news.  Charlotte has been wiggling this tooth all day.  It started out sort of wiggly and I told her that it would probably come out in about a week.  But she wiggled it and pulled on it and wiggled some more and pulled it out while I was reading to her tonight.  She was so happy.  (Lydia's been a little arrogant about losing two teeth before Charlotte even lost one.) I told her the tooth fairy starts flying around at 7:00 so she has to wait until tomorrow before the tooth fairy will come.  (It's Sunday night, and we don't have any quarters or lifesavers in the house.)

Here is one more piece of news.  And this could change everything.

Brandon had a job interview on Wednesday.  It's for a position that is perfect for him and will pay very well.  The interview went well and he should hear back this week.  We are really hoping he gets the job and that we'll be able to get out on our own soon.  If that does happen I'll probably always remember this January as a good month.

The title from this post is based on a line from Shakespeare's Richard the III.  But if Brandon gets that job then more of that passage will apply.  

Now is the winter of our discontent
Made glorious summer by this sun of York [job offer];
And all the clouds that lour'd upon our house
In the deep bosom of the ocean buried.
Now are our brows bound with victorious wreaths;
Our bruised arms hung up for monuments;
Our stern alarums changed to merry meetings,
Our dreadful marches to delightful measures.

Let's hope my next post is all about glorious summer.